As I write the update for this week, I am uncomfortable and in quite a bit of pain after having my port installed Thursday evening. It would seem true that days 3-4 are the worst after installation, especially when it’s installed on the side you sleep on, throwing off all ability to find peace while trying to rest.
It’s hard not to focus on the uncontrollable things like the increasing bills, insurance coverage, the world collapsing around us, and questions on how chemo will or won’t be covered – especially when I can’t get a grip on the pain issues. But I’m trying my best. The burdensome feelings are heavy this week and I’m doing what I can to keep moving forward regardless, as I don’t have a choice. I just want to survive.
Thank you to those who donated via other platforms or mailed donations. I am forever grateful. Please, please consider sharing the GoFundMe on your platforms. Sharing costs nothing and you never know who might see it and want to help a stranger.
This past week included:
–Monday 19th PET scan. I survived the PET scan, thankfully, and the results showed one tiny positive – it has not yet metastasized throughout my body. That means this very aggressive cancer is, for now, contained in my breast and one lymph node.
–Prepping the House & Chemo Bag. There are so many things that go into chemo treatment and care aside from what happens at the hospital. Especially if you are becoming your own home nurse doing your own shots and support in between treatments at the cancer center. Thanks to a few kind-hearted supporters (CG, TH, LH, & mom) I was gifted some of the important pieces off my Amazon list to help make this chemo adventure a bit more tolerable. There are still a few needed and helpful items on it for those interested in helping that way.
In the house, we prepare with extra sheets, blankets, specific areas, and pieces for ‘chemo shed days’ (the first 48hrs after each treatment), having all of the support meds (both OTC and Rx) ready, plans for hydration and ostomy support, who is toting my offspring where, and who will be toting me around (thanks to my son for being my best chauffer).
–Thursday 22nd Port Installation Surgery. My port was installed late Thursday afternoon. The first attempt on the desired right-chest side failed, leaving me with an incision through my tattoo, which thankfully my good sir surgeon fixed to not be wonky. The second attempt on my left-chest was successful. Unfortunately, this left an intensely painful internal hematoma on the right, and on the left the typical pain, discomfort, and limited movement and restriction from the insertion. Lots of pain and going through copious amounts of ice on both sides, and on my back. (Good thing it snowed, I suppose.)
It is hard to “reach” for things, can’t lift, or reach across my body, to say, scratch an itch on my right side is simply impossible. Deep breathing is okay, until the tip top portion of the lungs inflate (the parts right by your collar bone…) and then it takes my breath away. Not to mention there is a foreign object in my chest now, which if you know me and my body from past experiences, I can feel every single side, bump, crease, catheter, and piece of the port. And it’s a bit like mental gymnastics to learn to ignore it.
–Friday 23rd First Med Delivery. I got my first specialty pharmacy delivery with some white blood cell making medication, sharps, a sharp disposal system, and pieces for that. Thankfully my oncologist and the pharmacist went to bat with insurance to get this covered, as insurance denied this standard part of care the first few tries. I fear this will be the way this all continues…constant denials and battles for coverage of the care I need. And deserve. Which really does not help ease the stress load on my end.
More Updates to Come!